Sanctuary

I am blessed, and God has given me so much. But all too often, I continue to live and consider all that I have been given with the anticipation that at some point the universe will drop a boot on my head. I worry that I am like the deer that has found a secret stash of sweet corn only to discover too late that it was a hunter's bait.

But that attitude comes from using my old understanding and thoughts when considering my Creator. It means that I am not trusting Him. Why do I feel that what God has given me and placed in my life will be taken away and or used against me? Because I have lost sight of a God that truly and deeply loves and cares for me and returned to the idea of a God that either doesn't care and leaves me to struggle through life on my own, or worse yet, a God who toys with me the way a child cruelly toys with and tortures an insect to watch it squirm.

God is not hunting me to cause me harm. He hasn't given me gifts and talents to use and people to love so that He can lure me into a sense of safety and get the easier kill shot. He loves me. He has made a sanctuary for me where the hunter is not allowed to go, and because He knows that I will go where the hunter is, driven by my own desires and instincts, and yes, needs, He has provided for me within the sanctuary. He planted a section of clover and sweet corn so that I can enjoy it in the safety of His refuge and not need to seek it out where it is being used as bait. He has made sure that there are areas I can rest, and run, and hide, and play in the sun. But it is up to me to make this place my home. Because it is in the leaving and returning to such safety that I am most vulnerable to the wise hunter who, unable to hunt inside the sanctuary, sets up at the border to kill the deer who comes and goes. Today I realize I need to stay within the sanctuary God has prepared for me, where my every need is provided for and I have the safety to live happy, joyous and free and am saturated with serenity.