Urgency Vs. Importance

It is so easy for me to make what I feel is a common human mistake. I confuse urgency with importance. When I feel the pressure of urgency about a situation then my mind magnifies it into something hugely important. But that is not always the truth. There are things that are always important and critical no matter how much or how little urgency seems to be attached to it.

When I first began my journey to recovery, I felt a sense of urgency with my program. I realized that if I did not build a foundation that could be trusted I would continue to use. Even if I did not die quickly from my addiction, what time I remained alive would be full of misery and emptiness. I could not bear that thought and worked hard to prevent it from happening, but as I stabilized and felt more assure in my sobriety, the sense of urgency faded, a dangerous sense of security eventually let me down because I failed to work the steps with the diligence of a dying man.

There is urgency that goes along with doing my job. I need to fulfill my obligations to my customers in a timely manner. I need to do more work so that my income is sufficient to provide for my needs and those of my family. I need to pay my bills before the date where there are negative consequences for not doing so. I need to....I need to....I need to.

All of those things are important. And the urgency that goes with them is legitimate. But my relationship with God and maintaining that spiritual connection is the most important part of each day. If I let my relationship with God fall off nothing else is going to work right either, because my motives and reasoning and responses to the rest of life become screwed up. I become the captain of my own ship in unknown seas with reefs and sandbars and other dangers I can not see or predict. Disaster is simply a matter of time.

Working my program of recovery helps me maintain that spiritual connection with God, and it also helps me remember the importance of treating what sometimes does not still feel like a problem when my program is strong. Being strengthened does not mean that I am not still vulnerable once I put that first drink or drug in my body. Working the program diligently keeps that truth fresh in my mind. It also insures that I will spend time in service to others and be available to help others who are struggling with the bondage of addiction. This is so very important, because recovery is like love. You can't keep it if you don't give it away.

God has blessed me with a family. I must maintain my relationship with Him and also maintain my sobriety or this great gift will be damaged, if not lost. But I also have to maintain that connection as well. I have to know and remember that I am not in control or in charge, that family is a we thing, a cooperative unit. I have to trust God to provide for my family and keep us emotionally, mentally and spiritually together. A sane family unit, one that is not dysfunctional is a result of God being a part of things. I believe He wants us together, happy, joyous, and free. When I believe that my family is a gift from God and that He wants the best for us, I can turn my will and the lives of my family over to His care. If you know the steps, you can see where this is going, and yes, they can all apply.

My God and my sobriety and my family...my relationship with my Creator, my relationship with my family, and yes, my relationship with myself, these are the important things, the most important things. Whether I feel a sense of urgency about them or whether I feel secure in a way that would make it easy to place them on the back burner for a short time so to speak, my ability to do anything else stems from how I am doing with these. I can not confuse the urgency of paying my bills and satisfying customers with the need to emotionally and mentally and spiritually care for and connect with my family. If I do, I could easily fail in not just one of these areas but in all of them.

Today, as deadlines long past hang over my head and fear of letting people down grows I will try to remember not to confuse urgency with importance. I need to maintain balance between the responsibilities of the day and the responsibilities of my life to keep all that God has given me....a relationship with Him that I could never earn or deserve, my sobriety, the relationships of my family, a career that I love, and the ability to be of service to others. What gifts, what life I have been given. But to keep it, I must remember the order I need to keep all aspects of my life in. Importance has little to do with deadlines and due dates.