Flying....Image 20

Soaring across a beautiful sunset above the water feels so amazing and so serene. I long for the feeling this image produces in me. But the truth is I have been feeling a little like this, as though I am flying above the world in the midst of a beautiful dream. And it is wonderful, and serene, and even a little frightening. After all I could fall.

But then I remember the rope, this parasailor is tethered to a boat and as long as he stays on the rope and the boat keeps moving he'll be fine. I am also tethered to something greater than myself, and no matter what else as long as I trust it, I can not fall.

I believe God has brought me to a place and time where I can fly and know peace and happiness more often than not. The dreams I have He has given me. I can enjoy the beauty around me as I fly. I can see the world through a lense and capture feeling as well as light. I can love and be loved as I am for who I am. I can dream.

And some of those dreams will come true. I can rejoice in that. Some of them will not, but that will not break me since I my God will not allow me to fall too hard too fast where the waters below can break me, and let's not forget if I find myself in the waters far from shore I have a life-preserver, the tools and knowledge I have been given to keep my afloat until the boat arrives to pick me up and carry me.

Image 19 ~ Treasure Recovery...even new recovery

Sometimes I degrade my recovery and treat it as though it has no value because I have had to start over. I say things like I only have so many days so I don't feel I have much to offer. Or I act as though my few weeks are somehow worth less than other's long years. But that's crap. My few weeks are a miracle of epic proportion, maybe even more of a miracle than the previous success of 15 months. It doesn't matter how little time I have done the road of recovery there are things I can offer and contribute and my success is precious. Others may find it amusing when I treasure the dream and beginning the way others treasure great successes, but treasuring the seed is how I will attain the fruit to appreciate.

Image 18

I saw this cow grazing so peacefully amidst the beauty of the country landscape. I realized that in many ways her life is more serene and fulfilled than mine. I need to learn the lesson the animals already know. Be content with what one has, and bask in the beauty around oneself, and life will be much less anxiety filled, much more peaceful, and so much less stressful. And even as I type those words the dreams I long for are screaming for my attention.

Image 17

Sometimes I feel like this rabbit, sneaking out at night and crouching, tense ready to bolt at the first sign of danger. Yet, I am no longer hiding in a hole and me feet are on the path. Afraid? Yes, but moving forward anyway. And with each successful mile, the fear lessens.

Image 16 ~ (6-1-10) A New Road

To be perfectly honest I do not particularly like this image. I find it boring. I didn't see much when I went looking for something to shoot the Tuesday after Memorial Day. So why shoot this if I didn't really like it? Because it reminded me of where I am. I am on a road now that I believe is leading somewhere special and good. I never believed I would be allowed to journey down this road before, but now I see that a bridge has been built. I can continue and will, even though the road has twists and turns I can not see beyond. I find it a little frightening at times, not knowing exactly where I'm going and what's around the next bend, but I feel hopeful that the destination will be even more than I ever dreamed it could be. And at the same time I am able to enjoy the beauty that is all around me more than ever.

Image 15

Image 14 (5-31-10)